29 December 2011

About Poem "Dearheart Friend"

The first two stanzas were written in July 1995, the rest Jan 1996 to a dear friend.  We had met earlier in 1995.  Emotionally I was hiding behind a self built wall.  He got me to open up and remove the wall or at least put a door in it.  Safe was how I felt with him.  I felt at the time that he was dealing with some things as well.  While we did not always speak of details of what we were dealing with, we were there for each other for that time.  I hope I was of some help to him as he was for me.  We traveled together through Scotland for couple of weeks in September.  We remained friends and that was all it would ever be.  He found another to love and marry.  Friends still, just not as close drifting apart with different paths to follow.  I treasure the time we had and glad still in touch every so often.  I found a hard copy of this while doing some cleaning - starting Spring cleaning early.

Poem: Dearheart Friend

Dearheart Friend
By Abby Weyr
July 1995 first two stanzas
Rest Jan 1996

Please, be not afraid
You are free to come or go.
My love for you binds me to you,
            not you to me.
I ask only to be treated with
            respect, courtesy and honesty
            as you have.

Please, be not afraid.
Come take my hand to share
            some time together.
You are welcomed into my life
share what you will of yours.

We joined hands and built bridges
            crossing more than water.
We traveled near and far, up and
            down, in and out;
Opening doors to healing peace,
            joy and love.

There have been disappointments, but
            mainly times have been good.
Through all this we have grown
            in love as friends.
But now we are close to the
            far side of a bridge.

Please, I am afraid.
The water rushes by and you
            are ahead.
My side of bridge is not yet
            done and
Once across our paths will
            part even more.

Please I am afraid.
I pray our love and friendship
            will keep paths open between us;
If not physically, then in heart
            And mind.
Taking my hand you help me
            Finish and cross.

Please, be at peace, I am now.
We have cried and laughed
            away the hurt
Let us go forward not alone,
            separate and together
Knowing the joy of having a
            friend in each other.

I love you, my dearheart friend.

23 December 2011

Twilight Fan Fiction Highlight / Reviews

Announcing an upcoming regular feature:  once or twice a week I will highlight and / or review a fan fiction story.  It may be something recently read, old favorite, or currently reading.  I am not a very critical reader so don't expect analysis of plot and characterizations.  I like what I like and will pass that info along.  Some items will be consistently mentioned - what kind of story, time frame takes place in, and rating.  Links and author summary will be provided.  Sources will be Ramblings and Thoughts site and Fan Fiction.net site.

I have already mentioned three stories on Facebook page, two Christmas stories since it is that time of year and a new one that I will explain after the links that follow:

Christmas in Ashland by persephonesfolly
Summary:  It’s Edward’s first Christmas in Ashland, Wisconsin.  How much trouble can a newborn vampire get into at Christmas time?

canon story, pre-Twilight, PG-13  
This is a nice two chapter story of Edward finding some Christmas spirit.

Christmas Angel by silly_bella
Summary:  How did Edward spend Christmas away from Bella and his family?

canon, New Moon, PG-13
short one chapter story where again Edward manages to find some Christmas spirit.

The Fairy Tale by Eh Bien
Renesmee and Jacob's courtship, wedding, and honeymoon, from Nessie's POV. Mostly fluff. Post-saga, canon. M for non-graphic sexual content.

canon, post Breaking Dawn, M 

This one was picked because it has a really good explanation of wolf side of imprinting on child. I have recently read a chapter of story where author made some disparaging remarks about vampires having babies and wolves imprinting on children.  Also one author posted review of Breaking Dawn and mentioned how the movie made Jacob's imprinting on Renesmee more understandable.  The explanation the Eh Bien gives in the story fits how I've thought about it and makes sense and not creepy.  That is why it is being highlighted.  All of the stories written by Eh Bien have been good and recommend all of them.  She says that she is an inexperienced writer, the stories don't reflect that inexperience.  They are all stories that I can read before bed and not worry about the characters, gentle is the adjective that keeps coming to mind.  Read and make up your own mind about them.  

So this is the start of regular feature.  I won't do any more until after the New Year.  
Merry Christmas    Happy New Year    Happy Hanukkah    Happy Yule    

04 December 2011

Book Movie Differences Twilight

With Breaking Dawn part 1 recently released and some discussions going on about the differences between the book and movie I decided to write up my thoughts on the subject for each book / movie combination.  Twilight up first, others as I review books/movies.

I read all the books after New Moon was released and then bought the Twilight DVD.  I hated it the first time watched it.  There were so many things wrong so early on in the movie.  After watching with the commentary I calmed down and now while I don’t hate it, I accept it for what it is – a translation from page to film, different medium different rules and exact translation not possible.

*There are not any other victims known to town folks by the nomads in the book.
*Bella in the book goes to Forks in January not March.   She is not vegetarian in the book.  They do not eat at the diner.
*The truck is waiting for her when she arrives at Charlie’s home from the airport.  Not brought by later by Billy and Jacob.  So she doesn’t ask Jacob to go to school with her.
*Considering how rainy it is I can’t imagine anyone leaving vehicle windows down.  Only in a movie to ease of making the shot – when she pulls into parking lot her first day of school.
*Bella memorizes the school map while waiting for first class so that she isn’t walking around with it like they show her doing in the movie. 
*She isn’t approached by any of other students until gets to first class, no newspaper article/picture.  She meets Mike, Jessica, and Eric in morning classes.  Angela has biology with her and walks her to that class.  Angela is very shy in the book.  Eric in the movie is combination of Eric and Ben in the book.
*The school cafeteria has long rectangle tables not round ones.  She sits facing the Cullen’s at that first lunch.
*The Cullen’s don’t walk into the cafeteria as in the movie, they are already sitting in their corner of room when she notices them and asks Jessica.
*The seating arrangement in the movie for biology class is not the same as in the book.  In the book their table is the back row and on the right hand side of room.  Bella does have the seat next to aisle.
*Bella does stay to turn in her slip the first day at the office rather than turning around and leaving right after Edward.
*The conversation during the onion root lab is a little different in the book.  Their fingers touch when he gives her the next slide and she notes the coldness and the energy.  He doesn’t say anything about lights affecting the colour of his eyes in the book. 
*Charlie puts chains on her tires, not new tires.
*The near miss accident is a little different.  Edward stays with Bella trapped between two cars.  He doesn’t push in on the door of the van.  He does push in on fender/bumper of next car and pulls it back out to return it to proper shape and Bella notices that.  He does lift the van and pulls Bella around so the van doesn’t crush her legs.
*The hospital scenes are different.  She confronts him alone in a hallway. 
*Edward doesn’t speak to Bella for six weeks after the accident.
*There is no field trip to green house/compose place. 
*Three boys plot to ask Bella to ask them to the Sadie Hawkins Dance – now known as girls’ choice dance.  Mike is first one and does it before bio class starts.  That is what prompts Edward to speak to her again.  It is that night that he first sneaks into her room after she is asleep.  Her reason for not going to dance is trip to Seattle, not Jacksonville.
*They sit together at lunch a couple of times more or less alone.  Have the not superhero but bad guy conversation.
*That weekend is when the weather is good enough for the First Beach trip where Bella meets Jacob for first time in long time.  She does pick up on the tribe not liking the Cullen’s and flirts with Jacob to get the story from him.
*Tuesday of the next week is the dress shopping trip to Port Angles.  They do not see the boys while trying on dresses.  They are men that corral her, not frat boys as in the movie.  Edward pulls Volvo around and she gets in and he stays in car driving off.  He goes someplace quiet and dark to try to calm down and ask her to distract him.  Then she looks at clock and mentions Angela and Jessica.  He takes her to restaurant.  They have a booth in out of way corner of place, not center of room.  The conversation at restaurant and drive home is different in book, but result is the same, he knows she knows what he is.
*That Saturday is the school dance and trip to meadow for Edward and Bella.  In the book they are aware of danger of being seen going off together if something should go wrong.  In the movie the meadow scene takes place as they skip school walking into woods from the school grounds – wrong!
*Then the next day is Bella’s visit to the Cullen home.  Rosalie and Emmett are not there.  They are not fixing her a meal.  Edward doesn’t take her up a tree, they just hang out in his room until takes her home to come back later for baseball game.
*James is the one that says “you brought a snack.” Not Laurent as in the movie.
*the rest of movie follows the book more closely with confrontation with the nomads, ploy to draw them away, trip to Phoenix.
*Bella ditches Alice and Jasper at airport as waiting for Edward, Carlisle and Emmett to arrive. 
*Alice helps Carlisle and Edward not Jasper and Emmett taking care of James.
*Jacob comes into the prom and dances with Bella while giving her message from Billy, not outside as in movie. 

This is written from memory of reading the book and watching the movie a few weeks ago.  I may have recalled some things incorrectly.  I may have missed some things.  This may be updated when I read and watch the movie again.

30 November 2011

Traditional Marriage summary

This is borrowed with permission.  This is the best summary I've read about this issue and I agree with all the points made.  Of special concern is #8.  There are some serious unpleasant consequences very likely if we continue down this road of legalizing same sex marriages.  I am not against same sex civil unions, they should have all the same legal rights as a traditional married couple.  
Author's info at bottom.  

In response to a blurb floating around ff.net regarding gay marriage, here are some thoughts on traditional marriage...

1) Pristine wilderness, organic food, unpolluted drinking water, sustainable energy, and traditional marriage are good things that Americans ought to encourage and support.

2) Gay marriage is not about rights, it's about acceptance. Civil unions provide all the same legal rights as marriage, with the only difference between the two being the name. Legalizing gay marriage is an attempt to force people to accept homosexuality.

3) The same legal arguments that support gay marriage also support polygamy, polyandry, incest, and other relationships that society does not accept as valid.

4) Traditional marriage has been around a long time and hasn't significantly changed; it has even survived the burdens sometimes placed on it by misogynistic and racist cultures.

5) Brittany Spears' 55-hour marriage of convience is evidence that traditional marriage is already taken too lightly in American society and needs more protection, not less.

6) As an institution, gay marriage CANNOT produce children. Traditional marriage can. Children are our future.

7) There is a vast body of scientific evidence which states children learn behaviors and gender roles - both good and bad - from their parents.

8) Freedom of religious belief (including the belief that marriage is a sacred institution) is Constitutionally guaranteed. Governments outlawing as hate-speech against protected classes the belief that traditional marriage is ordained of God is a violation of First Amendment rights.

9) The best predictor of poverty in children isn't race or the educational level of their parents - it's single parenthood. Strong traditional marriages, with both a mother and a father in the home, is the best weapon we have against child poverty in America. Children are healthiest when they have positive role models for both genders. This happens best in traditional marriages, and for the health and wellbeing of children, traditional marriage ought to be encouraged and bolstered.

10) Traditional marriage is not just another aspect of American society, it is the bedrock of all societies. Technology, clothing styles, economies, religions, and governments all come and go, but the institutions of traditional marriages and families are foundational and enduring. Weakening the foundation destabilizes the entire structure.

11) It's wrong to throw rocks at people, shout ugly names at them, vandalize their houses with graffiti, or take away their employment without cause. This is true whether you are being cruel because they're gay or because they supported Proposition 8. Persecution by either side in the name of tolerance is an oxymoron.

If you agree with these statements, re-post them in your profile.

23 November 2011

Happy Thanksgiving

I posted this to my Facebook page this morning.  Some may read this that aren't on Facebook.  Another thing I am grateful for is this blog as a creative outlet, a place to put thoughts and poems to share with others.  It is not updated as frequently as originally thought it would be.  Maybe with holidays and shorter work hours I may catch up on writing some thoughts to share.  

Good Morning!  Happy Thanksgiving!  For those traveling may you arrive safely and have an enjoyable time at your destinations.  I am grateful for a lot of things, what I’m going to mention here is you and Facebook.  It is a nice way to stay in touch, get back in touch and meet new friends.  Your posts make me laugh, cry, think, and stare in wonder and awe.  We share good times and bad times.  We multiply joy and divide sorrow.  Some I know better than others, some I’d like to know better than do, some I’ve never met and may never actually meet – all from various parts of my life – church, family, high school classmates, science fiction & Twilight fandom, Scottish organizations, work and other interests.  Thank you for being my friend.  May God bless you and yours now and throughout the year with all you may need.  

16 November 2011

Twilight Tuesday 15 Nov 11

Due to work schedule change and being more than a little tired last night, this posting about the third and final Twilight Tuesday, Eclipse is a day late.  This is Part 3 of my birthday celebration this year.  Part 4 will be Breaking Dawn, a little more than 24hrs.  So on with the report:

Julie Jones was the one to introduce this special material.  Showed the trailer for Eclipse.  Also showed footage from ComiCon and the premiere.  Then Julie, Booboo Stewart, Nikki Reed, Jackson Rathbone, and Taylor Lautner introduced their favorite scenes.  All very expected ones for each actor.  The bonfire scene for Julie, Booboo and Taylor.  Jasper's back story for Jackson.  Rosalie's back story for Nikki, didn't mention filmed the scene with her and friend's baby.  She mentioned they designed/made the coat she was wearing.  Taylor appeared via film at the studio they were using for everyone else.  He liked the Jacob/Bella especially and the J/B/Edward scenes.

One thing that was strange for all of these introductions was the camera angle.  Had them straight on to camera and then camera move to right while they continued talking straight ahead.  Kind of strange thing to do in my opinion.

It was nice to see the three movies again on big screen.  You notice things don't necessarily see from DVD on TV or computer screen.  I'd be willing to do it again next year before BD part 2.

08 November 2011

Twilight Tuesday 8 Nov 11

Twilight Tuesday, New Moon

Same as last time, being posted soon after getting home from the event.  There were about 15-20 people in the theatre.  That is smaller than I expected.  I thought the word would have gotten out and more people would be there.  Maybe the crowd won't happen until Breaking Dawn.

Jackson Rathbone and Nikki Reed were the two actors for the special footage before the film.  Jackson started off with acknowledging the fan support being how got to second film.  There were a few clips from ComiCon 2009.  Ashley Green with shoulder length hair.  Kristen Stewart with her Runaways hair.  Amazed at the fan support even after the year before.  Some clips from filming in Italy were shown - Chris Weitz commenting on secret American/Canada locations but here had thousands of people to watch.   They used winners of fan contests as extras in the St Marcus Day celebration.  Had clip of Robert as stepping out from clock tower with the dots all over to use when put the sparkle in later.  Also showed some clips from premiere.

Jackson and Nikki both narrated Jackson's favorite scene in New Moon.  It is the birthday party scene when Jasper goes all feral from a little paper cut.  Nikki mentioned that it was a late night filming and they were all kind of tired and punchy.  She would look away as a way to keep Rosalie in serious mode, liked looking at Emmett.  Both mentioned how this scene shows just how dangerous vampires can be.  [Bella pay attention.]

That is all I can remember.  If TL has a report from someone take better notes, I'll edit this.

01 November 2011

Twilight Tuesday 1 Nov 11

This is being posted soon after got home from the event.  I will review and may edit in the morning.  There are a couple of things that I don't recall details of, kind of hard to write in the dark.  Happy Birthday to me Part 1.   Wednesday morning Twilight Lexicon posted the favorite scene introductions by the four actors.

Twilight Tuesday 1 November 2011    Twilight

Jackson Rathbone introduced the special feature prior to the movie as something for the fans to enjoy and way to say thanks. 
All started with the Twilight trailer, which was then shown.
Then Nikki Reed introduced scenes from ComiCon 2008
            And full sequence of Robert Pattison playing Bella’ Lullaby
                        Apparently at school

Back to Jackson for favorite scene:  baseball game, he is not left handed so had to learn to hit lefty, fun with the baseball bat tricks

Back to Nikki and her favorite scene:  fixing dinner for Bella on her first visit to the Cullen family home -  first shot she actually cut her fingers and they just gave her some zebra stripped driving gloves to wear to cover it up, and also told to not get so close to Bella.

Julia Jones introduced her favorite scene:  when Bella walks into biology class first time.  [forgot what she said about it]

Booboo Stewart introduced his favorite scene:  the fight in ballet studio  [forgot what he said about it’

Jackson or Nikki introduced scenes from the premiere of Twilight, amazed at the fan support so big that early. 

Then Jackson wrapped up with intro to Breaking Dawn part 1 trailer, then Twilight movie.

30 October 2011

No Supernatural

Happy Halloween and Happy Celtic New Year and Happy Samhain!  I am not posting as regularly as originally planned, life happens.  No poems are in the making.  Thoughts generated by fan fiction reading is my treat for you today.

There are some stories about what would happen to Bella and Jacob if no supernatural in their world.  A couple that I have recently read are directly in response to Jacob’s comments in Eclipse about them being just right for each other – chapter 26 Ethics, pg 598-9 paperback - and all the fans that want Bella with Jacob.  Both of these stories have Bella being killed in the school parking lot her second week in Forks.  There would have been no chance for Bella and Jacob as they wouldn’t have even met. 

These two stories figure that the accident would have happened anyway – weather would have been the same with or without supernatural.  I think that the Jacob/Bella fans are assuming that the accident would not happen, thus giving Bella and Jacob the chance to meet and fall in love. 

My thoughts are similar and different.  The accident was set up to expose Edward’s extra speed to Bella.  If there were no supernatural, Bella would not be a danger magnet, klutzy yes but not a danger magnet.  My assumption is that the accident would not have happened.  So what would life in Forks area be like with no Cullen’s, no supernatural, but still keep some points of the books? 

Bella would have gone dress shopping with friends and they would have run into car problems.  She would have gone to Seattle rather than the dance and had problems with her truck on the road.  These two incidents would prompt her to start learning about car / truck maintenance.  Her dad and then Jacob would be her instructors.  [Idea from What Drives Her by Virginia May that fits too well to ignore the likelihood of it happening.]

Similar to the books this is how Bella and Jacob would have become friends.  Jacob would have fallen for her.  Bella would not have fallen for him.  The two year difference in ages would have been one consideration.  The friendship she has with Jacob would have helped Bella come out of her shyness to some degree.  He would be a good younger friend.  She would have learned about the Indian culture and heard lots of stories about reservation life.  This would have sparked her interest in recording the stories and histories,

Leah and Sam would have stayed together and married.  Harry would have a heart attack and died.  Sue and Charlie would have gotten together.  Jacob would graduate from high school and community college and opened auto shop in the Forks area.

Bella would have stayed in Washington for college.  She would have blossomed in college.  I see her getting a degree in English with either anthropology or journalism minor.  She would have met someone in college, likely they were majoring in her minor.  They would have gone on to graduate school and / or worked on gathering stories and histories of Native Americans and published.  The intent would be to bring to general public these stories and need to help preserve these cultures – becoming something of an activist.  They would travel for awhile and settle eventually into teaching somewhere and raise a family.  Still travel and publish just not as constantly as beginning of their married life.  Perhaps Bella would become a fiction writer as well as her non-fiction Native American writings. 

In a narrow life Bella and Jacob might have ended up together.  They likely would have been happy.  Bella would have been somewhat unfulfilled, if she recognized it or not, I’m not sure.  Going to college would open Bella to more of life and she would have begun to see the male chauvinism that Jacob had in him and not accepted it.  They would remain good friends.  Jacob would find a nice girl to marry and settle down to raise family.  The Olympic peninsula would remain home for Bella and her family even if lived some place else.

That is how I imagine things would have gone if no supernatural in their lives.  

11 October 2011

Power of Words

The Power of Words:  curse, swear, dirty, vulgar
Abby Weyr October 2011

This has been prompted by a couple of recent things.  One was the too casual use of a vulgar word on a web site that was on my list here.  The other was the inappropriate use of same vulgar word in a specific fan fiction that I had enjoyed reading up to that use.

Curse words are used far too commonly currently, especially by the younger generation.  They are called curse words for a reason.  They are no longer just expletives to express strong emotions.  They have become common adjectives.  They have become trivial to the younger generation.  People have become desensitized to their meaning.

You say to someone “Go to hell!” that is a curse.  You want them dead.  You want them to suffer in the hereafter for eternity.  Hell being a state of outer darkness and cold or burning fire, either one would include suffering for eternity.  How does that relate to having a good time?

You say to someone “Damn you!” that is a curse.  A dam stops water from flowing down a river.  Damning a person stops their eternal progression.  Even in the afterlife we have opportunity to progress.  Can you imagine keeping a 2 year old child at that age forever?  Or being a teenager forever?  It is a curse to keep anyone at any stage of life stuck at that point, to stop their progressing. 

The other three common vulgar words are not necessarily curse words per se.  Sh** and cr** describe something usually not pleasant smelling or looking.  Fu** is the worst of the bunch.  There is a violent connotation with that word making it close to rape.  How does that become an adjective?  Especially out of a 100+ year old vampire character to mean “She looks terrific” not once but twice?  How does it become a casually used word with such violence behind it?  How does it become used in context of making love or having sex in a good way?  How does it become a ‘turn on’ word to a 17year old female character when spoken by that 100+ year old vampire boy friend? 

As a society we have become insensitive to the power of these words the same as we’ve become insensitive to violent images.  This is really a sad state of affairs.  It use to be women would not use these words.  It used to be that men would not use them in mixed company at least if use them at all.  They are words to be used as expletives and hopefully rarely.  Now it doesn’t matter who, what, or when use any of them.  It use to be that using them for adjectives was thought of as an indication of lack of education.  What happened to courtesy, to civility, and to respecting the sensibilities of others?

27 September 2011

Two Announcemens

A new web site has been added to the list – Comfort of Chaos.  It is a blog by the lady that got me started on posting fan fiction, Kayla Griffith.  She has one novel that she working on getting published and apparently starting on another.  One of her posts deals with the options in the publishing field.  She is the administrator on Ramblings and Thoughts, Twilight Fan Fiction and Art.  She writes fan fiction, under name of Openhome, currently working on finishing a trilogy about Alice and Jasper.  You can check out her ff profile on R&T and FFn and info on her blog also.  She is a wife, mom, Boy Scout leader, teacher, writer, and likely a few other things too, very busy lady.  I am looking forward to reading her publishing adventure and whatever else she writes about on her blog.

Abby Weyr has a Facebook page.  That will be used to announce new postings on this blog.  Also used to keep up with entertainment news on movies, TV shows, etc.  Spreading my wings out to other places.

06 September 2011

New web site links added

One of the authors that I read sent me info on a TWS canon contest.  Thank you Ginnie.

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/3041014   is the FFn profile for the stories.  There are 28 stories for the Pre-Twilight round.  You have about 2 weeks to read and vote for each round.  The stories that I've read so far have been well done and enjoyable read.  One I don't get.  Maybe my brain is still a little fried from the weekend at Pleasanton Highland Games.

http://thecanontour.tumblr.com/  is the web site for the contest.

Please, go read and vote and support TWS canon stories.

30 August 2011

Happy Labor Day Weekend

Don't look for anything else from me for a few days.  A friend is coming in from out of state.  Haven't seen and spent time with her in ages.  I have taken Friday off and we are having our own mini Twilight Con, watch the movies and The Hillywood Show parodies, talk, relax and whatever else strikes our fancy.  Saturday will be Highland Games!  It will be her first time going and I'm so excited to share it with her.  Hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable holiday weekend.

24 August 2011

Phase 2 complete

Awpaw.blogspot.com phase 2 is complete.   All of currently written poems and some commentaries are posted as of 23 August 2011.  Now onto the scarier part:  writing more poems and commentary about life in general, fandom and Twilight to share.  Please show your support with comments or ‘like’ Facebook posts or follow the blog.  That support will be greatly appreciated and much needed. 

23 August 2011

About Poems: Conflict and Rest

This is a trio of poems about Edward under the group title "Conflict and Rest".  The first one, "That Piece", is based on a fan fiction "A Coming of Age" by Elise Shaw, link on right side of post.  The second, "Torn", is just the general problems Edward has between two conflicting things.  The last one, "Solace", is his rest in music and Bella.  Comments are always appreciated.  Hope you enjoy.  December 2011 update:  "A Coming of Age" is no longer available to read.

Poem: That Piece

That Piece
By abbyweyr June 2011
Based on A Coming of Age by Elise Shaw, Chapter 12

First time at Chicago Symphony
Father put me on his lap so
I could watch and hear.
It was captivating, especially
That piece.

Asked for piano lessons
That were denied until
Tried to pick out by ear
That piece.

Years later practicing
Mother called me to get
Our doctor for father.
I was practicing
That piece.

Did not know at the time
That was last Human time
Touched the piano keys and it was
That piece.

A few years later a night out
With Carlisle and Esme
Hear another orchestra
They played
That piece

My worlds collided that night
Past and present and future
Tsunami waves of memories connected to
That piece

Emotions erupted with disastrous results
Pent up and denied for so long
Anger, hurt, loss, and thirst all boiled up
New memory, new loss to connect to
That piece.

Poem: Torn

By abbyweyr July 2011
Inspired by TWS by Stephenie Meyer
And fan fiction

As a boy life was simple
Baseball or piano practice
Was all I was torn between

As a youth life a little more complicated
College and law or army soldier
Was all I was torn between

As a newborn immortal
Back to simple things
Torn between human or animal blood

Instinct and thirst great for human blood
Respect and love for Carlisle
Overcame instinct, satisfied with animal blood

Until hearing the thirst from two others
Added to my own became
Torn between leaving or staying with family

Left family to take human blood
From human monsters
Torn between rapist or murders

Human blood did not fill
The empty hole from
Tearing apart family

Returned to repair the tear in family
Returned to animal blood
Torn no more between family or human blood


One January day in biology class
Hit with the most delicious scent
Torn between kill now or later my singer

Kill all the classmate witnesses or
Kill the secretary or follow her home
Torn between kill quickly or slowly my singer

Follow the path of Carlisle
Follow natural instinct
Torn between kill singer or deny bloodlust

Expose the whole family
Tear a hole in family
Torn between kill singer or leave family

Leave hole in family
Return to family and singer
Torn between stay away or risk exposure

Who is this insignificant human girl child
To awaken thirst for human blood?
Torn between stay away or return home

Return to repair hole in family and me
Control and discipline paramount
Torn between satisfy curiosity or bloodlust

Discovered who this insignificant girl child is
She opened my world to the love of a mate
Torn between bloodlust and safety

Constant throat burn being near her
Stay near or leave
Torn between thirst and keeping her safe

Always, no matter what, keep her safe.

Poem: Solace

By abbyweyr July 2011
Inspired by TWS by Stephenie Meyer

Fingers dance across piano keys
Notes float in air
Music lets my mind be alone
Music is my solace

Even before my change
Music was a place to just be
Emotions flowed in and around the notes
As my fingers danced across the keys

Now immortal, music still
Is a place to just be
To express emotions
As my fingers dance across the keys

Music is my rest and refuge
From the constant noise of mental voices
As I play piano or listen to recorded
Music is my solace.

No where else do I have quiet
To hear only my thoughts
But within the solace of music
Until a quiet mind that is not heard

With her quiet mind
I hear only my thoughts
And still be with someone
Music is no longer my only solace

20 August 2011

Poem: Carlisle and Esme

Carlisle and Esme
By abbyweyr June 2011
Based on TWS by Stephenie Meyer
Sweet sixteen Esme Platt
Broke her leg falling out of a tree.
She met Dr Carlisle Cullen
As he set her leg.

She was entranced by the handsome
Blond haired doctor with British accent
And cold hands that felt so good
On broken leg.

He left the area soon after.
Was there a reason why?
Did he think of her
During those passing years?

Ten years later they meet again.
He was working in the morgue that night.
She is thought to be dead
From falling off cliff after newborn baby died.

He heard her still beating heart.
He remembered the sweet sixteen girl
Falling out of tree breaking just a leg.
This time so much more is broken.

His doctor skills alone will not help.
He quickly decides to give her a
Second life with a bite to neck
To start healing and the change.

She burns for three days.
She imagines she is in hell
For leaving abusive husband
And jumping off a cliff.

Carlisle by her side while she burns
To comfort as much as possible.
She remembers from long ago
The handsome doctor.
She sees and hears him vaguely,
Thinks that it is nothing more
Than the day dreams she has had
For these passing years.

She wakes to a new life
With the dream doctor
A reality by her side
To tell her she is now

A vampire.

She is confused as a newborn.
He is confused as her sire.
Was there something more
To his reasons to change her?

What were his motives for
Giving her a second life?
Edward his companion for
Two years wonders the same thing.

He hears their thoughts;
Sees their feelings develop
For each other,
But they deny them.

Carlisle alone for so long
Is unsure what he feels.
Does not know what to do.
He watches her shyly.

Esme as a newborn vampire
Needs time to adjust without
Added emotional turmoil;
Or so he thinks.

He tries to keep a respectful
Distance between them
As he and Edward teach her
About being a vampire.

Esme remembers the day dreams
Of the handsome doctor
From her youthful days;
A standard suitors never met.

Esme adjusts to being in the
Cullen coven drinking animal blood.
They slowly realize their feelings
Of love are mutual.

Perhaps mind reading Edward
Helped along the way.
Carlisle and Esme, eternal mates
No longer alone.

What started as one alone
Became two as father and son;
Then a family of three
Bound by love freely given.

Poem: Emmett and Rosalie

Emmett and Rosalie
By abbyweyr June 2011
Based on TWS by Stephenie Meyer

Emmett went hunting meat for his family.
Rosalie went hunting animal blood for her.
Emmett found a bear that decided to have
Him for dinner instead of being dinner.

Rosalie smelled the blood.
The bear didn’t have a chance.
Emmett saw an angel
Then was flying in her arms.

There was something about him
That drew Rosalie to
Run 100 miles with a bloody
Emmett in her arms.

She wasn’t happy with her existence
But there was something about him.
She asked Carlisle to change him
To save him for her

She stayed at his side while he burned.
He thought she was an angel in hell
When he woke to the new life as a vampire
He was fine being with his beautiful angel.

They were a matched pair
Balancing each other so well.
She had the attention she needed
He had a beautiful angel all his own.

He made her laugh.
Her life was lighter with him.
They became a mated pair
The second in the Cullen family.

The Cullen vampire family
Two couples and one single
One family of five
Bound by love freely given.

About Poems: Twilight Couples

As promised back to posting poems.  The earlier poems I wrote without preview help.  They were posted on Ramblings and Thoughts and Fanfiction.net.  They were being read and reviewed, even marked as favorites.  One early review after just the first two mentioned looking forward to more.  That encouraged me to write some more and the next batch came about.  I was having some problems with these couple poems and wanted some preview help.  I asked one of the regular reviews of my poems on R&T to preview and beta them and asked a friend for the same help.  Christine and Karen helped make all of these poems better and hopefully all future ones too.  Thank you ladies for the assistance and encouragement.

I am putting this "About" in the middle of a set of four poems about the Twilight Couples.  So far I've only done the Cullens.  There are other couples and I am thinking about those, but nothing has come together yet.

After doing the Alice, Twilight Lexicon and Stephenie poems I thought about what next to write on.  There are two authors writing stories about Carlisle and Esme's early years.  These stories are wonderful in same way as Singularity and the original saga.  So I started thinking about Carlisle and Esme as a couple and thought maybe I could do a poem for each Twilight couple.  Hope you enjoy.  Comments are greatly appreciated.

There are links to these Carlisle and Esme stories on the right side:
No Longer Alone by Elise Shaw
A Coming of Age by Elise Shaw
Stained Glass Soul by Mackenzielle    this is Esme's point of view
Behind Stained Glass by Mackenzielle   these chapters are Carlisle's or Edward's pov

Poem: Alice and Jasper

Alice and Jasper
By abbyweyr June 2011
Based on TWS books by Stephenie Meyer

She woke a lone vampire
Not knowing who or what she was.
She had visions of a blond haired man
Who was to be her love, her mate.

She had visions of a yellow eyed vampire family;
She longed to be a part of that family.
First she had to find her mate so
They could join family together.

He was the youngest Major in Confederate Army.
Found and turned by a vampire to be
Commander of her vampire army;
To claim human cattle as feeding fields.

He knew blood and battle.
There was passion for the one who turned him.
Time and emotions wore him out.
He broke free of vampire army.

She learned to hunt animals to be like the
Yellow eyed vampire family of five.
He hunted humans, becoming lost;
Price was getting too much to pay.

She was searching and waiting for him
Saw visions of him, but would miss
Being in right place at right time.

He was searching for peace from the
Emotional torment of hunting humans;
Without knowing it also looking for her.

Her visions became clearer.
They were closer to becoming reality.
She knew they would be together
And that he was clueless.

A rainy night in Philadelphia
The time was right for the two.
He found the diner to get out of rain.
She approached him as soon as he entered.

Battle scarred Jasper felt new emotions
From the petite pixie approaching him,
Calmed his wariness of this stranger.
He felt his own hope for first time.

She had waited 28 years.
He had existed for 85 years.
Now he found his mate and
Began to live.

They left that diner together.
She shared her vision of
Yellow eyed family of five.
For two years they searched.

The Cullen vampire family of five
Became family of seven;
Three mated couples and one single
Bound by love freely given.

Poem: Bella and Edward

Bella and Edward
By abbyweyr June 2011
Based on TWS by Stephenie Meyer

She arrived mid school year.
Their eyes met across a crowded cafeteria.
He was sitting with siblings,
She was sitting with classmates.

She asked about the group of five
Sitting separate from rest.
She noticed things no one else saw
But was not put off by the differences.

She blushed being caught staring.
He frowned not able to ‘hear’ her.
He could ‘hear’ unkind thoughts from classmates.
Strangely he wanted to protect her from them.

The only empty seat in the biology class
Was to share a lab table with him.
She walked by a fan that blew her scent
Straight to a suddenly very thirsty vampire.

Her scent was the most delicious
He had ever come across in nearly 90 years.
He had not had human blood for 75 years;
He was tempted to break his animal blood diet.

He resisted the siren call of her blood
Keeping Carlisle’s face in mind.
He protected her and classmates.
It was a tortuous hour for him.

She noticed his strange black eyes,
Wondered if he was breathing.
He looked so angry at her
Did not say one word to her.

He ran too quickly from that room.
Then in office trying to get out of that class
Ran into her again and tempted
Even more with only one other there.

He ran out again too quickly for human.
She was confused and hurt by his actions;
Could not understand why angry or hate her
When never met, never spoke.

He did not go home that day,
Went to Alaska to collect himself.
How could an insignificant human girl
Chase him away from his family?

Her siren blood was not worth
Disruption to his family.
He could face her and overcome
The call of her siren blood.

He returned to classes.
He spoke to her in biology.
Their fingers touched
Electricity felt by both.

Next morning he literally protected
Her from being crushed by skidding van
Using his vampire speed and strength.
She noticed and could not be dissuaded.

That moment of holding her was not enough.
He wanted more and not just her blood anymore.
He asked her to lie about how he saved her
And promised an explanation.

At the hospital explanation was denied.
They parted in anger.
She tried to speak to him the next day;
And was still denied.

For six weeks only talk about the lab at hand.
Then girl’s choice dance was coming up.
She had three boys that wanted to go with her.
He realized he was jealous of those boys.

She refused all offers to go to dance;
Too clumsy to dance, made other plans
For that weekend of dance;
Drive her old truck to Seattle.

Went with some friends to First Beach.
Ran into old family friend that fixed and
Sold the old truck to her father.
He told her scary tribal stories.

Went with two girl friends to find dresses
And find a book of Indian legends.
She got lost and was found by the
Wrong kind of human monster.

He was there to save her again;
Took her to dinner and then home
But not before questions were answered.
She knew what he was.

She was still in car alone with him.
This was good and this was bad.
There was something not right.
She had no sense of self preservation.

A human could not know about them.
How can he have a relationship with her?
They are so different, he could hurt her
So easily just not being careful enough.

He picks her up for school,
They talk, questions back and forth.
Arrange a trip on Saturday to Seattle;
Until Alice forewarns it will be sunny.

His throat is on fire around her
From the siren call of her blood.
His spirit aches to know her soul,
Above all he needs to keep her safe.

They go to his favorite quiet place.
Hiking at human pace to the meadow.
She sees his sparkly skin,
Strength and speed of predator.

They learn more about each other,
Thoughts and feelings are shared.
She sees his human side as well.
They share a kiss that seals their love.
The Cullen vampire family is now
Three mated vampire couples and
One single vampire with his still human mate.
Bound by love freely given.

16 August 2011

The last Web site info posting

Last part of web sites info for now.  Poems later this week.  I recently added four web sites on the list.  I am not overly familiar with any of these.

LDS Church - Mormon.org has information for non-members about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  I am a member and haven't visited this site. 

Page to Premiere.com follows popular books once picked up to be made into films to their premiere.  This started off with Twilight and Harry Potter and the founder decided to expand it.  Nicely done site. 

Good Reads is a book recommendation site.  A friend recommend this one and looks interesting.  I do need to read something else besides Twilight Saga books and fan fiction. 

Fictionators is a Twilight fan fiction review site.  They post teasers to stories along with reviews.  There is an archived list of stories that they have recommended.  There are apparently special columns posted each day of week.  Virginia May posted teasers to two stories I'm following is how I found this and haven't explored much of the site as yet. 

Update 12 September 2011:  Looked around and read some things on the Fictionators site.  I found the use of vulgar language too frequent and inappropriate.  I have removed them from the web site list.

14 August 2011

Information about fan fiction sites, R&T and FFN

Part 3 of web site info posts, after this back to poems.

There are two fan fiction sites that my Twilight poems are posted on and that I read regularly - RamblingsandThoughts.com and FanFiction.net.  There are others sites out there, I'm just limiting the black hole of time to two sites.  They are very different sites.

R&T is my favorite site.  It has old pod casts - Forkcasts, link to Twilight Lexicon, fan fiction writing tips, fan fiction, link to Twilight Lexicon forums, and blog.  I have not yet listened to the podcasts.  TL and forums are already on favorites lists.  The writing tips are useful.  It has been awhile since I looked at the blog part.  My recollection is that one entry is how the administrator, Openhome, started writing rather than painting - interesting story.

The fan fiction stories are canon or close to and they are rated PG13 or lower. The stories tend to be missing scenes, times not covered in the books at all - the summers and back stories, same as books but from different character's point of view - Edward being the most popular.  It is a nice clean safe place to read canon stories.  Some of the humorous ones are a little or whole lot over the top on the characters, but that is to be expected for the parody and humor.  There are categories listed so if you want story in a particular book, you can find them easily.  There are a small number of Alternate Universe stories.  There are some poems, lots besides mine.  The summaries are good.  The stories are well written, good grammar and spelling and editing.  That is not to say they are perfect.  There are still typo's and occasionally misused words.  Spell check doesn't work so well for correctly spelled sound alike words.

You do need to register to be able to leave a review.  Anyone can read the reviews.  I try to write them so as to not give anything away in the story in case someone reads the reviews before reading the story [which I do sometimes].  The stats - number of reviews, number of readers, are easily available.  There is a place to look if the story is completed or not.  Word count and number of chapters are also shown.  The author's response to reviews are available to read for everyone.  All the authors say they read the reviews, some reply some don't.  Reviews are the only way author knows if you have actually read or just visited and passed on by.  Reviews help the author improve their writing and the story.

Fan Fiction.net is for books, tv shows, movies, comics, etc.  On the home page you make your selection and go from there.  There are Mature rated stories.  The summaries sometime are bad.  The stories are sometimes bad.  The stories are all over the place - canon, AU, all human (AH), TWS fantasy stories.  Anyone at any age can post stories - that includes preteens.  There are stories in other languages.  If you are looking for a particular story, best to already have the URL or look for it by author name.  Story title is not a search options.  The option labeled story is for story content.  You do not need to register to leave a review for some stories/authors.  The author's response is not available for anyone to read, not nice of FFN in my opinion.  The replies are sent via private message.  There are some really good stories as well.  There are communities that gather stories according to number of reviews, recommended by TWM or TL or someone in particular.  I think the different fanfic awards have own communities so you can read the stories that won and / or nominated.  What I have started doing is looking at the favorite lists of authors I like and checking out those stories and authors.  If you register you can sign up for story alerts when updated.

It is kind of fun to read a story like a serial on weekly basis or whatever time frame the author is using.  Reminds me of the old serials before the Saturday matinee feature.  Frustrating at times when left on a cliff.  You can look at the whole list of author's stories and get an idea if they will finish or not.  Most authors write notes at start and end of each chapter, you get to know the author to some degree.

There is a link on TL site for another fanfic site - Twilighted.  I have visited a couple of times and leave rather quickly; I feel very uncomfortable just looking at their home page.  There are very explicit sex stories on that site.  You do have to register for over 18 years old to get access to those stories.

Have a great week!

13 August 2011

Information about The Hillywood Show

The Hillywood Show is the creation of two sisters, Hilly and Hannah Hindi, using one camera for their parodies and sketches.  They do most of the makeup and costumes along with script writing, directing and filming.  They have done parodies of all the Twilight movies, one or two Harry Potter ones, a Dark Knight, Runaways, and The Vampire Diaries.   They have over a dozen Hillywood Show episodes with characters like Jack Sparrow, Sweeny Todd, Edward Scissorhands and Beetlejuice.  There are several holiday themed parodies - Christmas and Hillyween.

Fan donations are greatly appreciated.  They have received funds from the Abby Weyr Support Starving Artists Foundation.  There are some DVD, T-Shirts that are sold as well.  And they are well worth the price.  They put on a great show.  Their actors closely resemble the movie and TV shows actors.  They are both dancers, so most all of the parodies are musicals with great group dances.  The Twilight movie parodies hit all the major points of the movies, so spend about 10 minutes watching the parodies is a good quick review.  

I had the pleasure of seeing them the first time at a Twilight CreationCon in Sacramento, September 2010.  That was the last time the full crew of five attended a con in our area, and close to last one ever.  The crew played Bella, Edward, Alice, Jasper and Jacob.  For the con, they would do little sketches as a way to introduce the next actor.  It was great!  To me that was the show and made it worth while to attend.  I had a chance to talk with them.  Sweetest young ladies ever.  Their mother helps at the table and is a really nice lady.  She looks more like an older sister than their mother and the sisters look like twins.  I saw them one more time at another Twilight CreationCon in our area, it was just the ladies, no more little intro sketches.  Sad.

So go over to the web site link page and click on The Hillywood Show and discover the fun for yourself.  Their most recent one is on Harry Potter, Deathly Hallows part 2.  Enjoy!

09 August 2011

Information about TL, TM and SM web sites

There may be some folks that may wander here and want some information about the web sites listed. This posting will cover Twilight Moms, Twilight Lexicon and Stephenie Meyer.

Twilight Moms is a web site for women over 21 and / or mothers that are interested in Twilight.  They are based in Utah.  There are forums to discuss various topics with other members – not all are Twilight related.  They have a ‘store’ with some really nice things.  Also some other web sites have small ads.  The main post area is for current news about the movies and the actors.  I personally find the forums to be a big black hole of time, so I visit rarely.  From the few times I’ve visited the postings are generally spell and grammar checked and intelligent written.  They accept donations for keeping the site up and running as the ‘store’ does not fully fund the operation.  Stephenie Meyer “It’s just so cool that I’m not the only 30+ mom and wife in love with fictional underage vampires and werewolves.”

Twilight Lexicon is the longest continual operation Twilight web site.  The two owners do not live in same state, one is in Tennessee, the other I’m not sure.  One of my poems is about them.  It is more an encyclopedia than a dictionary in my opinion but Twilight Lexicon sounds better and easier to spell.  They have a forum area as well, same thing applies as at Twilight Moms.  The book discussions are moderated more with specific questions asked.  Again there is area for non Twilight related items.  They have a link to Amazon.com for ordering items and they earn some money that way.  There are more ads on this site, but usually not interfere with main postings.  As at TM the main postings are news items about movies, books, actors and some informational posting by owners.  Stephenie Meyer “…the brightest star in the Twilight online universe…”

I have found both of these sites to be accurate and only post things legally.  They check sources and confirm source material.  They both are very good about notify if posted video content not for office/children and anything of a spoiler nature is clearly labeled and ‘hidden’, ie you have to click on something to get that info.  You can leave comments about the postings fairly easily on TL, not as easily on TM at least that has been my experience.  Both sites occasionally run contests with nice prizes.  They work with Creation Entertainment, Inc at times to giveaway passes to conventions.  Owners of both sites are recognized by Summit Studios and some major entertainment news sources and have been interviewed at various events about Twilight and the fan community. 

Last for this posting is Stephenie Meyer’s own web site.  Her brother, Seth, is the web master.  It has information on the books that she has written.  There are some outtakes from early Twilight books.  There is also the leaked Midnight Sun draft available with the story behind the leak.  I found Twilight Moms and Twilight Lexicon from this site.  There is not a way to contact her through this web site.  Contact info is for reporting problems with the site.  

05 August 2011

No Poem This Week

I’m a bit disappointed and discouraged is why I’ve not posted for a longer time than usual.  There has been just one comment.  Stats are available to tell me how many people visit, but I don’t know if anyone reads anything without comments.  Even my family and friends for the most part have not supported me in this endeavor.  I started this as a place to get my writings out there regardless if anyone read or not.  Now I’m not so sure about that, or at least not regular twice a week postings.

I now better understand the fan fiction author requests for reviews.  I don’t go along with the idea and threat of withholding updates to stories until get certain number of reviews.  With a story I think the author would get that out regardless – have the story inside you and it needs to get out.  That is how it was for me anyway with the poems.  Maybe not polish, maybe not publish….  As with most things in life, one’s opinion of things can change once you are actually in the other person’s position.   

I still have two sets of poems to post and will work on doing that next week.  There are three different fun things to do this weekend.  Laundry and grocery shopping done today and then play time. Hope you have a great weekend too.

30 July 2011

Poem: Twilight Lexicon

Twilight Lexicon
By abbyweyr  June 2011
A tribute to Twilight Lexicon

First there was a book
Then came fans
Then came fan fiction
Then came web sites

Alphie started a fan fic story
Stephenie reviewed it
Questions were asked
And answered

Info needed to be shared
And organized
With help from friends
Twilight Lexicon was born

Just a month after Alphie
Read the first book.
And within six months of
Book’s publication date

More friends helped and
Met more friends on line
They gathered information
And organized into a lexicon

You can find anything and everything
Twilight nicely categorized from
Books and movies and news
On Twilight Lexicon

They provide fans with the latest
News and pictures and videos
They traveled to Forks and movie sets
To share with fans all they can

There are forums for fans to discuss
All things Twilight and other general topics too
This provides a safe place for fans
To gather and meet others of like mind.
They have survived all the controversies
They have seen people leave in disgust
And new ones join in the Twilight universe
The longest continuous running Twilight site.

We thank you Alphie and Pel and all the
Forum leaders and helpful tech support
For keeping us up to date and providing a
Good clean place to hang out.

About Poem "Twilight Lexicon"

Twilight Lexicon (TL) is one of two Twilight related web site I visit regularly.  I found it as a featured web site on Stehpenie Meyer's web site, before that list went strictly alphabetical.  I looked at a variety of sites and found TL to be the most professional and mature looking, clean and easy to navigate around.  Good info nicely organized if not always typo free. Very much to my taste.  It helped me get caught up with the Twilight fandom, especially the movie material.  And they had personal correspondence with Ms Meyer providing even more info.  

There is information on how it got started on the site and about the staff.  It is the longest continuous running Twilight web site.  The two ladies, screen names Alphie and Pel, wanted / needed a place to gather all the info about Twilight into a lexicon.  Now it is really more an encyclopedia rather than a dictionary of Twilight info along with news and forums.  The forums are a big black hole of time for me [worse than fan fiction], so I don't visit them often.  They have high standards of accurate news reporting, no trashy stuff, no stolen pictures/footage.  Recently they did a great job of live blogging from ComiCon.

Since my poems are a way to express my thanks and pay tribute, one for TL was needed.  As with the one on Ms Meyer, I am not completely satisfied with it as is.   We will have to wait and see if inspiration brings a better version.  Thanks ladies for a comfortable place to visit and get Twilight fix of news and info.

Poem: Stephenie Meyer

Stephenie Meyer, Twilight
By abbyweyr June 2011
A tribute to TWS author based on known history

Stephenie woke up from a dream:
A couple in a beautiful meadow
She a chocolate eyed beauty
He a sparkly vampire

He was thirsty for her blood
But overrode that thirst for
The thirst of knowing her
Of being with her

She was mystified by him
It was stupid and possibly dangerous
But she didn’t want to resist
She trusted him to keep her safe

Stephanie wrote the rest of the story
And then how they got to the meadow
Shared it with her sister who
Encouraged her to publish

That was the beginning of Twilight
Three books followed the first
Then the movies and another
Book along with Official Guide

The stories told of Bella and Edward
Of their choices made and
Consequences followed
Jacob made it a love triangle

Through it all the three
Survived and love flourished
Human, shape shifters and the good
Sparkly vampires live together.

We thank you Stephenie and your
Sister for encouraging you to share
Your dream story, adding sparkly
Vampire romance to our lives

We thank you for wonderful characters
And their fascinating stories
That you allow us to play with as long as
We play nice with proper disclaimers included.