Dear Santa December 2021

 Dear Santa,

I do not want any material things, I am still downsizing. Non clutter items would be ok. 

What I want most is better health and less stress for my friends. One friend is still living out of her truck, so permanent home for her would be great. 

People to buy the things I would like to sell rather than just give away. 

Non clutter items: spa day, manicure, pedicure, massage, GF & DF food, gift cards for Safeway or Walmart or QFC, company for a meal, company for a day trip out and about, company maybe help with cleaning/going through boxes. 

AW 

Interest in Twilight Fading

I posted on Facebook about my interest in Twilight beginning to fade. One person commented ‘to watch that fade’. Another said that ‘it would never fade for them’. One person tried to explain my comment and wasn’t correct.

This is not a simple situation and not a sudden one. There are a few different factors.

One is that Twilight is the only vampire story I’m interested in. I’ve tried a couple of other series and haven’t finished one book.

Two is that romance is not my primary or even secondary reading choice. Science fiction in general and mystery are my primary and secondary choices.

The rest of these are not necessary in order:

** is that most of the Twilight fan fiction that is available has too much and too detailed sex; I am not interested in that. I am surprised that most of it is still on FanFiction.net. I skip over the sex but am getting tired of having to do that. It seems that most Twilight fans are interested and want more and more sex details.

** it seems that most Twilight fans are interested in the actors not the books. I am not a big fan of the movies. I don’t get what Catherine Hardwick was trying to do with the blue filter, all the moodiness doesn’t work for me, along with the time line changed and so many technical errors in the Twilight film. New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn 1 were good. BD 2 was huge disappointment. I do not follow any of the actors. Most of their film work since has been R rated and I don’t watch R rated movies. I have never been one to follow any one particular person or thing, no posters on my walls growing up.

** it seems that most Twilight fans are interested in seeing pictures of nearly naked men. In New Moon, they had to have taped ‘Edward’s’ slacks to him at the clock tower, they were riding so low on his hips, again I’m not interested. Not interested in nearly naked women either.

** I read fan fiction. I post to Facebook about what I read, it seems to me that no one notices, no one responds, no one wants to talk about any of the stories, none of my friends seems to read Twilight fan fiction. I’ve pretty much stopped posting about it. With all the sex, I’m reading few new ones, sticking with rereading favorites.

** A lot of core friends from my Twilight experience have drifted away for various reasons. A few I feel betrayed me.

** To me the story line I like in the Twilight Saga is the ‘coming of age’ of Bella, not the romance. Her journey from shy girl in the shadows into the shield against the Volturi is more interesting than the romance with an arrogant vampire or the romance triangle.

** It seems to me that as the years have gone by that there is less and less that I have in common with other Twilight fans. With no one to share my interest in Twilight, that interest it is fading and I am returning to my roots of science fiction. A better balance of my interests, not just one series. There are still some Twilight friends, that I hope that I can stay friends with mainly because we’ve found other things in common.  

** I read the books in 2010. First attended Stephenie Meyer Days in 2013. I intend to attend Forever Twilight in Forks in 2022 for the full time, may even buy a full ticket. That will be my tenth year attending. That will complete the movie anniversary cycle. After that likely only attend one day to try to see friends. Which is kinda almost pointless because of the number of people and how busy they schedule things there is hardly any downtime to just visit with folks. Attend to see The Olympic Coven.

** I miss the feeling of belonging that had from TaffCon. Everyone has just drifted apart. Miss Carol and Andy and Staci especially.

 

Be careful about what you wish for

 

Be careful about what you wish for, you might just get it

Today is 29 October 2021. Found out a couple of things that people didn’t tell me about and feeling very left out, missing an opportunity to do something. Bitter for a minute or two but mostly sad with wet leaky eyes.

I have always wanted, ok maybe just for a very long time, to fly under the radar so to speak. Be a gray shadow, not noticed, no attention, just quietly go about a simple life. Turns out to be mostly true and last few years realized how lonely it is. Don’t want to go out and party but be nice to have a friend to share some time with. Be nice to be wanted and invited to things on occasion. Instead, it seems people mostly don’t want to spend time with me. Once they do, not a second time.

Today’s ‘straw that broke this camel’s back’:

I lent some doTerra On Guard product to The Olympic Coven during Forever Twilight in Forks. It was mostly extra items, but I wanted the left over back if none of them wanted to take it home. FTF was 11-13 September. I have been asking a young lady (YL) cast member that is staying in Forks about getting those left over items back since then, over a month. I made it easy for her – give it to a friend in Forks and I’d come pick it up. No response. I visited friend mid October and nothing from YL.

A few days, maybe a week ago, one member of OC posted that she was going to do a different character for a special Twilight character shoot in November in Forks that was being set up by this YL. Thought that would be cool to see and wondered if open to having visitors. She cosplays some great cross dressing characters outside of Twilight that I would love to see in person. She was also asking for help to get to Forks. I donated via Ko-fi. I didn’t follow up and ask about visiting, figured they wouldn’t.

Today another member of the OC shared a post from another member of the cast for this shoot, not a member of the OC cast [at least not yet]. I donated via his Ko-fi and asked when it was happening. I also sent an IM to the YL about keeping the doTerra to use for this shoot. Mentioned how nice it would be to see it, November is my birthday month. Her reply was that she had passed the doTerra items to my friend already. My friend hadn’t mentioned it to me. This is first the YL had told me that she had passed it along. They had 60 slots for visitors and already filed, didn’t know I would like to come. I’m a big fan of the OC. Support them as much as can. Of course, I’d like to come. Obvious. But I’m not part of their ‘in crowd’ of friends and associates.

I am just a gray shadow, unnoticed, unimportant, useful at times, but otherwise not worthy of notice or anyone’s time and effort. I got what I wished for. 

YL didn’t tell me items passed along. Friend didn’t tell me that had it.

Apparently, it is asking too much to be kept informed.  

Sad missing opportunity to see something that would be fun to see.

This on top of not getting response to needed information that I didn’t hear / follow during the DW RS Presidency meeting. It has only been a day since I sent minutes of meeting and asked for the info. Note the ‘didn’t hear’, how much use is a secretary that can’t hear everything?

This on top of frustration with medical people not listening and helping me feel better. Having to go through unnecessary hoops first. Almost a year now since had little to no energy. I want to do things.

This on top of asking if any locals interested in going to Poulsbo to see The Chosen movie on 1 or 2 December and getting no response.

This on top of a friend saying in spring she’d love to get away and do some day trips on occasion. We did one.

I’m old and concerned that if something should happen that I wouldn’t be able to handle things and take care of myself. I want to get out, but more comfortable doing it with company. Everyone has family, jobs, etc or just not interested in event or me. I don’t want to be at the top of anyone’s list of ‘drop everything and help’ but it would be nice to be on list of ‘let’s see what we can rearrange to help’; it would be nice to be thought of once in a while, remembered for being a good supporting fan/friend, to be invited.

The negative I’m worthless, not good enough, etc thoughts are running around and won’t be caged up and put away.

On the plus side there are people coming to Seattle Temple on my birthday to help me get my brother sealed to our parents.

On the plus side I did get an invitation for Thanksgiving Day dinner that will be GF without being extra work.

Guess I’m just not supposed to be at that shoot in Forks. Sad about that, but….maybe the Lord is keeping me out of trouble. Still sad.

 Update 22 Nov: Yes, I was kept out of trouble. There was a big storm that caused trees down and mud slides to block all the roads in/out of Forks. People were trapped for about three days. 

Ward Spotlight June 2021 full length

In my current church ward, we do a spotlight on a sister in weekly newsletter as a way to get to know each other. This is my full length version. The printed version can only be one page. The other side is used for announcements. 

The following questions are to help us get to know you better. To participate, please answer the questions you would like us to post. Please feel free to send us digital pictures.

What is your name?  Pamela Ann Rice, prefer Pam

What is your marital status?  Single, never married

If you are, or have been married, is there anything you would like to share about how you met, or anything else about your spouse or relationship?   Never married, so thought I’d share my introduction to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. The summer of 1965 we had a long road trip vacation. We were living in Grand Forks ND at the time. We traveled to Seattle Wa, then to Pasadena Ca, then Las Vegas/Grand Canyon, then Salt Lake City, then home. My parents knew of the Church and some of its history. We went to Temple Square. I remember the sea gull monument and the exhibits in the old visitors center – mostly the ancient history ones, that was my interest back then. Time jump to 1974 when I went to the Spokane World Expo and toured the Church’s exhibit. I filled out a little form at end of tour, pretty sure I said I wasn’t interested in more info. A few months later Missionaries knocked on my door. I felt the Spirit when taught about Joseph Smith and First Vision. I was baptized shortly before leaving for an one year remote tour of duty in Turkey.

Current living situation? Kids? Grandkids? Pets? Parents? Roommates? House? Apt? etc. I live alone in a new manufactured home. My parents and brother dead. Nephews and Nieces all live far away.

Where else have you lived?  All over the world. My father was in USAF and I also joined. I was born at Ft Lewis, Wa; Pasadena, Ca; Manila AFB, Philippine Islands; Del Rio, Texas; O’Fallon, Ill for Scott AFB; Denver, Colorado; Orlando, Florida; Wiesbaden, Germany for Hq USAFE; Grand Forks, ND; father retired moved to Orlando and then Cocoa Beach Florida; graduated HS, local community college and then to Boca Raton Florida for Florida Atlantic University; San Francisco Bay Area, where I ended up entering USAF; Lackland AFB for Officer Training School in San Antonio Texas; McGuire AFB, New Jersey, this is where I joined the LDS faith; remote site in Turkey; Vandenberg AFB, Ca; Sunnyvale AFB, Ca; discharged from service; Tucson Arizona for UA Pharmacy School; Sunnyvale, Ca; San Jose, Ca; Sacramento, Ca for 18 month assignment kinda in middle of San Jose time; Sequim Washington.

What brought you to Sequim? And how long have you been here?  Moved here January 2018. Visited area, Forks mostly, for first time in September 2013 for Stephenie Meyer Days and fell in love with area. When I decided to retire and needed to move out of San Jose, I decided to come to this area. Visited Port Angeles, Port Townsend, Forks, Sequim, decided on Sequim.

Tell us about the family you grew up with. Siblings? Parents? How did you work together? Play together? Unique traditions? challenges? triumphs?     Two parents, one older brother, all dead now. I remember family painting outside of house in Orlando Florida. I was young and short and did the lower parts. Remember playing board games. My mother started having serious health problems in Denver and less play, more chores and taking care. She spent time in hospital in Orlando and in Germany. We were in Germany while I was in 6^th, 7^th, and 8^th grade. I was old enough to know I was having a special opportunity and young enough to ask often “Are we there yet?” on our road trip vacations. We took advantage and traveled in summer throughout Europe.

Recent or current occupation   retired Pharmacist [legalized drug pusher].

Education or past work experience  BS Chemistry 1971 FAU, BS Pharmacy 1984 UA. Worked as a chemist testing for pesticides in vegetables in Bella Glade Florida. Worked in photography studio in Palo Alto Ca. In USAF I was a Space Systems Operations Officer. I watched for Sea Launched Ballistic Missiles from Russian submarines for my first duty assignment out of OTS. Then to Turkey to track satellites. Then to Vandenberg to track satellites to send commands to them. Sunnyvale AFB I worked on just one satellite program. I worked in various community pharmacies for 30+ years.

Indoor hobbies  reading, photography, use to do needlework until arthritis in hands made it too hard. Attending and working at science fiction conventions.

Outdoor hobbies  photography, hiking. Attending and sometimes working at Scottish Highland Games. Attending Renaissance Faires.

What brings you peace?  Completing a project [usually finish reading a book], Classical music, being out in nature.

Do you have a scripture, talk, hymn or any other spiritual insight that has helped you recently?    There are many hymns that touch my spirit. There are two that are especially noteworthy – I Stand All Amazed and I’ll Go Where You Want Me to Go. My favorite scripture is Psalm 27: 1, “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” King James Version. With my depression / anxiety I try to keep this in mind, doesn’t always totally work, but does help.

Is there anything funny or unique about you that most of us don't know?    I have a blog that is not very active with some poems I wrote at awpaw.blogspot.com.  Abby Weyr Poems and Writing. My pen name is Abby Weyr. Public picture albums on my Facebook and at pamrice.smugmug.com.

Pictures included were: at St Helens Swan House with BD 2 blanket that I won in Prop Store auction. My official Captain picture.  

 

 

 

Road trip to Vancouver Wa 4 to 6 June 2021

My friends, Jim and Christine Johnston, recently moved from Utah to Vancouver Washington. LOTS closer to me. We are now in same time zone and only about 4-5 hours driving time apart! I was able to go visit them Friday to Sunday, 4-6 June 2021.

The drive down was a lot longer than should have been. Road work along the Hood Canal for about 15 miles had spaces of one lane traffic. It is a curvy road and can’t drive fast anyway, but those one lane stops really slowed things down. There was a funeral to attend via Zoom that I ended up missing.

I got off freeway ok, but there was no street sign for the park they live in so bypassed it the first time. Finally arrived at their temporary quarters. Nice park. Chatted a bit while stood up and Christine on break from her training for new job. Then off to motel for me. Google maps did good job on getting me to both places.

Went back over for dinner. Nice to have good food and good company for conversation. Chatted and caught up on life. Christine visited me in 2019, but haven’t seen Jim since 2015. We went for a drive to see his new work site and a bit of Vancouver and Portland. He is lucky living about 10-15 minutes from work and before major commute traffic in Portland starts. He’s enjoying the company, coworkers and new job. We sorta planned out the travel plan for the next day.

They are not big Twilight fans but support me with my interest and were willing to go see the filming sites in St Helens. The weather was only cloudy in St Helens. We drove up to the Swan House, then the parking lot to see the ‘bookstore’ and alley. Drove by the ‘dress shop’ and the county seat that shows up in the HalloweenTown movies and the marina. Then on the Cascade Locks and Multnomah Falls.

We went back to Washington side to go across the Bridge of Gods. It started raining on our way there. Still able to see some nice scenery, just not as much with clouds and rain. Stopped for lunch at the Bridgeside restaurant. GF buns and soup available! Ate too much for mostly sit down and riding in car day, but it was good. The weather cleared some while ate, so able to get some bridge pictures without getting soaked.

The soaking waited until we got to Multnomah Falls. The main parking lot is between the east / west directions of highway I 84 and almost full. The lot accessed from highway 30 was full. My back was bothering me so I got out the rollator so able to sit when needed and I needed to. With the rain it was wet but it didn’t matter. While driving the other side of river we could still see the fire damage, but not noticeable around the Lodge and Falls. Took a bunch of pictures and posted to pamrice.smugmug.com. Turned a penny into a souvenir at the gift shop. Nothing else caught my eye at either gift shops. We all got soaked. So homeward. Oh forgot to mention Jim was driving. A rare treat for me to not drive. They dropped me off at the motel to dry off and put some heat on back.

I went back to their quarters for evening. We all decided still full from lunch so no meal. We watched a couple of movies, Rio and 100% Wolf. Both are animated films. They were both enjoyable. Laughed lots. Disappointed that Nigel didn’t completely bite the dust in Rio. I knew a little about Rio but 100% Wolf was unknown. The summary sounded fun and it was. A great day!

Wish the motel room was better so sleep better. The people upstairs seemed to walk back and forth all night and not lightly footsteps. Also the room was too close to the street so traffic noise was too loud at times. Think I will use a different motel when visit again.

Up and away about 9am on Sunday. Drive home started off dry. Rain started about Woodland and rest of way home. No road work to slow traffic down. I took a side trip up to Mt Walker south view point. Four miles up the mountain from the highway on an one + pull outs lane road. It was a little nerve racking driving up and back. Drove through some clouds and no rain at top with view point. It was windy and interesting hearing the leaves moving. On a clear day one can see Mt Rainer, it wasn’t clear could barely see next mountain over. I’ve been wanting to take that trip up and it was worth it, just have to do again when the weather is clear. Another car was coming up as I was going down. I was closer to pull out on my side so let them by. There were a couple of larger pull out areas, one with a nice view.

I had a light lunch in car before final miles to home. Car unloaded. Caught up with things on laptop. Looked forward to sleeping in my own bed. It was a good trip. Glad I was able to go and visit my friends. Hope the possible more permanent residence opens up soon.

More pictures are at https://pamrice.smugmug.com/5-June-2021-Road-Trip/