06 December 2025

Memories: Thanksgiving and My Birthday

 

These two events are kind of close for me. Some years like this year they are the same day. I was born on the Sunday after Thanksgiving. The story told is that the doctors were going to plan my mother’s second cesarian on Monday and they planned to go duck hunting on Sunday. I decided I wanted out so doctors missed their duck hunting trip, and I was born early Sunday morning.

I don’t remember much of anything specific about birthday celebrations or Thanksgivings growing up. Mom would bake our favorite pie or cake for our birthday. Cakes got decorated fancy and pies got fancy top crusts. I vaguely remember either Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner at friend’s home when I was 14 yo. Two years later we spent Thanksgiving at my boyfriend’s home. Watching the football games was more fun with more people. Sometimes Dad would invite a single younger member of his unit to join us for Thanksgiving. Mom made cornbread, and the dressing often had chestnuts in it. I liked eating the crispy skin while putting things away. I like eating drumsticks and wings and as youngest I usually got my choice.

First or second year of community college, I dressed up especially nice on my birthday and had plans after classes. I ended up coming home after first class sick. That messed up my birthday and Thanksgiving that year. Mom gave me some Pepto Bismol and that added vomiting to my symptoms. Actually, felt better after getting whatever out of stomach.

My brother’s birthday is a week later. Being close to Christmas, birthday presents were not a big deal, we both waited for gifts at Christmas. Then after reading The Hobbit and The Ring trilogy I decided to be like a Hobbit for my birthday and started giving gifts on/for my birthday.

One year while living in Sunnyvale I decided to do up a Thanksgiving dinner. I spent a lot of time on phone with my mother over the week and day. That was my one and only attempt at full fancy dinner. I don’t remember who or how many people were at the table. I mean I don’t even do a regular dinner well, way over my skill set to do holiday dinner. Guess it turned out ok as no memory of fabulous success or major disaster. Another year my parents came to visit me, and we went out for dinner, even with reservations it was a long wait and not worth it. [thinking more about this and I’m not sure it was Thanksgiving, it was a holiday weekend is all I’m sure of]

Uncle Robert and Aunt Patti lived in San Jose for a while, and they would invite the local family members for Thanksgiving dinner. My cousin David and his family and cousin Jeff S. I took some fancy Jello salad for my contribution at least once. Those were nice dinners and time. It was especially interesting talking with Cousin Jeff. I tried to get together with him outside of that and never worked out.

My parents were living in Florida, and I was in California when dad had major heart attack and ended up dying mid-November. I was able to get off work and flew home, made it before he passed. Ended up close enough to Thanksgiving I asked if I could stay until then and help settle mother. We had a full turkey dinner. Mom tended toward Southern cooking and cornbread was part of holiday meals. She made it from scratch. That year she forgot the item that makes it rise. We had thin cornbread. It tasted great and toasted up good too. We laughed about it.

My neighbor in San Jose, Frank M, invited me along to go to a friend’s home for Thanksgiving once. That was fun. We played some games and had a delightful conversation.

Another San Jose Neighbor, Laura H, invited me a few times to Thanksgiving dinner. There were a lot of children. Dinners were kind of noisy and fun. Afterward we would watch a Christmas movie or two.

Had a couple of nice events for my birthday while living in San Jose. One year a friend, Carol C, came down and we went to a ‘sing it yourself’ Messiah after walking around the Christmas in Park displays. That was way cool. I mostly kept up with where I was suppose to be for the Hallelujah Chorus.

Another year three of us, Carol C & Laura B & me, met up and attending a family Saturday English version of the opera The Magic Flute at San Francisco Opera House. That was cool. We rode BART into SF and ended up hailing a cab to get to Opera House. Always wanted to do that. I’m not a big city person but seen that so much in TV and movies. Carol’s and Laura’s birthday are earlier in the month, so it was all of our birthday celebration.

The Harvest Festival was in San Jose the weekend after Thanksgiving and the Christmas in the Park displays opened the Friday after. That was my usual celebration. I love walking around craft fairs. I like buying from the makers directly. I was introduced to Mexican hot chocolate at the CiP. My Uncle Robert and Aunt Patti joined me one year walking around the craft fair.

I think it was the first or second year I moved to Sequim, that Gay had Sherri and I come over for Thanksgiving / Bday dinner. One year attended a GF dinner at a friend’s home, Erica B. That was nice not having to worry and wonder.

Four years ago I invited some friends to meet at Seattle Temple and help me seal my brother to our parents on my birthday. That was nice. I brought some delicious GF cupcakes to have in the cafeteria after session. While there found out one of male members needed a ambulance ride to hospital for what turned out to be a kidney stone. He was our ride to temple. The temple workers got things figured out so we would have a ride home, just had to wait for the end of their shift. There were two of us, Wanda F and I, that rode with the Jim & Janell H. Josh & Rachel T were in area visiting family and joined us. Big drive for friends Jim and Christine J coming from Vancouver Wa.   

Looking through Facebook memories more usual birthday celebrations were going to see a movie, a couple of trips to Temple, or out to dinner. This year I did creative birthday party making glass on glass mosaic pictures, with Janell, Candy, Cindy, Sharon, Sharri, and Gay, Susan Z was our instructor. We grout the work on 1 Dec.

Wonder what I’ll do next year. Next year I will have lived longer than parents and brother. Whale watching? Victoria?

Update: 1999 at LosCon I went from shoulder length hair to short and spikey on my 50th birthday. They were doing a haircut service to make wigs for cancer patients. I thought it would be a cool significant thing to do for my 50th. I think I told one person beforehand. Loved the reactions from people when I came back from that trip and new hair style. 

For my 70th the celebration was months long, starting with a party at Forever Twilight in Forks. That was the big thing. I think I did something kind of special once a month, movie, dinner out or something, with different people. 

Thank you for the reminder Christine. How did I forget the hair cut? 


 

 

 

 

20 August 2025

Not all Republicans are MAGAites

 

Not all Republicans are MAGAites

The Republican Party is no longer the conservative party. The increasing national debt under the Republican party is evidence of that.

The Republican Party is no longer the States’ Rights party. Most recently the demand to change the way states conduct elections clearly shows that. Sending military troops into cities without being asked by governor is more evidence.

The Republican Party is no longer the law and order party. Their current leader is a convicted felon that gave pardons to over a thousand other convicted felons. They deny ‘due process’ of our legal system to people they kidnap in their sweeps.

The Republican Party is no longer the family values party. Their current leader cheated on each of his three wives.

The current Republican administration is one of death to as many people as possible in the cruelest ways possible. The actions and policies of this Republican administration are cruel, inhumane, and destructive to our democratic Republic. Anyone that supports these actions and policies are as guilty as the ones treating people in cruel and inhumane manner and working to destroy our county.

The Republican Party has been taken over by right wing extremists that I refer to as MAGAites. They value loyalty to their leader above all other character traits.

Not all Republicans are MAGAites. Some still want the old Republican and Conservative ideals. They need to make a new party. They need to speak up against the Republican policies that violate their Conservative values. 

I don’t hate anyone. I feel sorry for 45/47 and his supporters and minions. They must not know love at all to be so angry and hateful. That is sad.  

 

20 July 2025

Poem: Healing, Who to Trust?

 

Healing, Who to Trust?

By Abby Weyr

28 October 2023

So many options.

Overwhelmed.

Paralyzed decision making.

No one to sit and talk with

To figure which is best.

Which to prioritize?

Physical

Emotional

Mental

All are a part of me.

How to balance the connection?

Who to trust?

Therapist

Chiropractor

Massage

Regular western medicine

Traditional Chinese medicine

Brain-Neurological

Naturopath

Holistic

Spiritual

Take this pill for this condition.

Do this for that condition.

All say they have the answer.

They all cost money.

Do I have enough?

Who to trust?

Who treat all of me?

They say answers inside of me,

But too little energy to look anymore.

Want a hand to hold.

Don’t want to walk this healing path all alone.

Who to trust as a guide?

So tired of no energy

Don’t know how to fix it.

Don’t know what to fix.

Thyroid or gut or back or emotional trauma

Physical or mental or emotional or spiritual

Have so much that needs to be done

And no help to do it

Just someone to be there and keep me going

Keep me on track

Both physically and in healing.

Everyone busy with own issues and family.

Not connected enough to anyone.

 

Poem: Reaching Out

 

Poem: Reaching Out

By Abby Weyr

25 June 2025

I reach out for connection

And nothing

Am I too subtle?

Or just no one to connect to?

FB delays posts

But even days later

No one asks “How am I?”

“Are you ok?”

I am not ok.

Bump on log.

Can’t do much beyond eat and sleep

Nothing of interests really

Read, here and there

TV, here and there

Better if not around except for mess leave behind.

Poem: Grey Shadow

 

Poem: Grey Shadow

By Abby Weyr, 30 October 2023

All I wanted to be was a grey shadow.

Fly under the radar.

Quietly go about my job.

No notice

Little responsibility.

A simple worker bee,

Not management.

Have time and energy for things

Outside of job.

No one to miss me when dead.

Miss no one when they leave

No one stays.

But it is what I want

Just a simple grey shadow.

It keeps me safe

No connections.

No feelings to hurt.

No feelings of love or joy.

Just flat and safe.

Better than up down inside out feelings

Less confusing.

Simple grey shadow is

Safe and known.

I’ve been successful,

That is all I am a grey shadow.

 

Poem: Hope is a trap

 

Hope is a trap

Abby Weyr 15 April 2023

Hope is a trap.

Things never change.

Hope is a delusion,

Encourage you to try

But always fail.

Nothing changes.

Never get caught up

Much less ahead.

What is the point?

Always more to do

And fail at.

Good for nothing

Good at nothing

Just pebble on path

To avoid.

 

 

 

 

Poem: Everything is hard

 

Poem: Everything is hard

23 March 2023 by Abby Weyr

 

With flow

Against flow

Everything is hard

 

Getting out of bed

Getting cleaned up

Getting dressed

 

Move from bed to recliner

Walking to mail box

Going to church

 

Cleaning CPAP

Changing bed linens

Doing laundry

 

Getting groceries

Fixing meal

Clean up after eating

 

Using toilet

Taking shower

Cleaning bathroom

 

Yes, I can do hard stuff, but

Everything is hard

Even reading

 

Just leave me alone

Let me just sit

Be a bump on log

 

So tired

Want to give up

Wish I could

 

 

But something keeps

Me going even if slow

And kind of miserable.

Poem: Moving through water

 

Poem: Moving through water

Abby Weyr 13 March 2023

 

Still water

Moving water

Both have pressure

 

Water up to neck

Most of time

Sometimes lower

 

Always there to make

It harder to move even

When water is still

 

Sometimes with flow

Sometimes against flow

Always some pressure

 

Doesn’t hurt

Just takes effort

All the time

 

Tired of making

The effort

To move

 

Frequently feel overwhelmed

Not drowning just overwhelmed

And too hard to move

 

Can’t raise feet to float

Or to swim

Only walk

 

Don’t know why

Don’t know what burdens

Hold feet down

 

Don’t know how to see or

How to lift those burdens

That won’t let me swim

 

Or how to let the

Water drain away

To walk free

 

Effort

Energy

Inertia

 

Tired of effort

Little energy

To counter inertia

 

Reduced to

Bump on

Log

 

Feel worthless

Though even a bump on log

Has a purpose

 

Can’t decide where

To go for help

Too many bad decisions

 

Overwhelmed with options

Overwhelmed with decisions

Overwhelmed with backlog of work

 

Tired of constant

Water pressure

Making hard to move

 

Tempted to give up and

Leave mess for others

Better able to handle things

 

 

 

Hard to see this as just a

Temporary problem

Seems like always been there

 

Never goes away

Little faith or hope

To ever be better

 

God and Jesus

Is an answer

Practicing my faith is effort

 

Tired of climbing

Mountain of life

Alone

 

Know life not suppose

To be easy

But not so hard all the time

 

Takes effort to move

From bed to

Recliner

 

Sometimes that is all can do

Even reading is effort

At times

 

Tired of trying

Rebel against

All the should be doing

Poem: Alone

 

Alone

7 March 2023 Abby Weyr

So tired

Doing everything alone

No one to help

No one to do anything for

 

All want to do alone

Is sleep

Read

Maybe eat

 

Tired

Doing what expected

Being where expected

Acting normal

 

Wish I wouldn’t wake

To another alone day

Or another fake it day

Don’t know what real anymore

 

Tired

Pushing against stay in bed

Daily mask cleaning

Daily blood pricking

 

So tired

Doing everything alone

No one to help

No one to do anything for

 

Every day same

Boring stuff

No fun

No company

 

Rare invites

Rare accepting invites from me

Everyone else busy

With someone else

 

Worthless

Bump on log

Hurts to stand

Can’t contribute

 

Hands don’t work so well either

Harder to read

Hard to hear

Hard to decide

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

19 June 2025

Poem: Stay or Go?

 

Poem: Stay or Go

By Abby Weyr

17-18 June 2025

 

Constant discussion in my head

Stay or Go?

Things and places I should do and be at

But I do not want to leave home

Just stay home in PJs.

Discussion goes on for hours.

Sometimes it ends too late to care.

Does anyone care anymore?

As age the stay home wins more

Take too much energy to overcome the stay

To get ready to go – clean and dress

Especially going alone

Or if too many people will be there.

Am I a prisoner of my mind in my home?

I eat same boring foods

Want to eat tasty foods without side effects

Do the same boring things

Want adventure with a companion

No one interested in sharing

They have their own adventure

I am too different

I am too tired

I am too boring

To have a companion

To share adventures with

Try to encourage self to go alone

Don’t need a companion for adventures

Tired of going alone

Scared as age of going alone and

Not able to deal with what might happen

No one interested in same type of adventures

I invite and get no response

No one invites me along

Feel like I’m a boring burden

Or boring bump on log